7:06 p.m. - 2007-10-12
Im glad everyone gave up on Diaryland. I can just write what ever the fuck I want and no one will read it anymore.
Claire is such a bad infulence.
I love hanging out with her though and I never really get to- besides at the bars n shit.
So when she said "What are you doing tonight"
And I said "Im going to Girl Talk"
And she said "I want to do coke and watch a movie with you"
-I gave my ticket away
-Picked Claire up
-Decided to call in sick to work
-Accedently picked up more coke than we needed
-Watched 2 episodes of The Office and did alot of the coke we bought
-Did more coke and watched a movie
-Drove Claire home
-Decided I would just sleep for 2 hours and then go to work
-Couldnt sleep untill a few minutes before I planned on leaving for work
-Woke up from a call from work
-Did a line to wake me up
-Went to work and did 3/4s of the coke I had left (throughout the course of the day)
-Came home and didnt want to be up all night again, cause I work tomorrow morning
When I do coke; I do some, then I wait a little bit, usually half an hour- 45 minutes, then I do some more. I repeat that untill I run out of coke. I have enough self control not to buy more when I run out, but when Im on it, I just want more and more of it in my nose.
I didnt want to be up all night or even do it for a bit of the night.
So about an hour ago, I got the last 1/4 of it set up. 3 very large lines. Way bigger than that which someone would do regularly. They were about a half gram each.
My whole face was numb, but the inside of my nose obviously burned all day.
***SIDE NOTE***
[When you snort back some cocaine, you do the amount you planned on- in one deep nasal inhale. Its not easy snorting back half a gram of some powder in one nose breath.]
I did one of the lines and took a breath and did half of the next line.
I didnt know what to do with myself, running around my house trying to figure out what I was going to do.
I talked to nick for a bit and then watched some Deal or No Deal, which is a pretty intense show normal- not to mention when youre insane with cocaine.
***SIDE NOTE***
[I dont smoke anymore, unless Im on drugs.
Its been about a month, with the exceptions of being on Acid last weekend, and The coke binge last night and today.]
I didnt have any cigarettes and I really didnt care about it, but going to buy some; was something I could go do. My nose started dripping badly.
Ever leave a band-aid on for a long time and when you take it off; there is a brownish stain on the gauze? Not blood, but more of a skin-juice.
That is what drips out of your nose when youre doing a lot of cocaine. The insides of your nostrils start to deteriorate.
Being eaten by the drugs.
I whipped my nose and drove to Shell.
Bought the Cigarettes.
Had Half of one before I got back to my house.
Did the rest of the coke.
I filled with panic moments later when I realized I didnt want to go out, but there is nothing for me to do at home.
So I came on here to write about it, cause there is no one to talk to, which is one of the only things you want to do while on coke.
