7:30 p.m. - 2007-04-01
I am just a fool for you.
I've been just so upset lately.
I haven't even been hard in like 2 weeks.
I've tried. I just can't keep my mind off of what is upsetting me so badly.
I don't want my mind off it.
Not only do I deserve to be tormented by the consequences of my actions, I'm also scared that if I try to forget about it- I'll loose my ambition to keep pursuing it. Cause even though its hurting me so right now, its what makes me my happiest.
My heart isn't dead and its not way past beating.
I've cried more in the last week than I have in the last couple of years.
